Unhealthy Choices

Appreciate Clothes

My 14 Completely Different Outfits (And Why I May Go Capsule)

Everything to the right of the green hanger is acceptable for spring. The rest is "back up" for now. Camis, tanks, sweaters, tops.

I remember sitting in my bedroom when I was 10 or 11-years-old, making a list of the outfits I could wear so I didn’t have to wear the same outfit twice in one week. As I got older (like high school), that list expanded to two weeks.

Be seen wearing the same article of clothing two days in a row?! Never!

I think I’ve lived most of my adult life with the two-week, 14 outfit, self-imposed rule. My closet is jammed full of clothes; most of which I do wear, and a lot I don’t.

Well, those that I don’t were eliminated last week.

A couple of years ago when I discovered Joshua Becker and the minimalist movement, I heard about Project 333 - having only 33 pieces of clothing in your closet for a three month period - the four seasons.

The idea is to rotate out the pieces that don’t belong in the current season; store them or get rid of them. Then you’re left with the items to mix and match to create different outfits over the next three months.

Lately I’ve been reading and watching YouTube videos about capsule wardrobes. (Links below.) Some people have up to 37 pieces, some have 50 or more. Items include pants, skirts, dresses, sweaters, layering pieces, shoes, coats, jackets. Accessories, pajamas, workout clothing, or “home” clothing (things used for sitting around the house or working in the yard) don’t count toward the capsule.

With this in mind I cleaned out my closet. I took out everything I no longer wear, no longer fits, no longer like or feel good in, and put it in a pile. When I was done I washed and dried the pile and dropped it off at Goodwill.

[That felt SO GOOD! It was amazing how it felt like a lifted weight!]

I took out the heavy winter items and some fall items and put them in another closet since I won’t use them for a few months.

Left in my closet now are things I love, are comfortable and I feel good in. I’m a long way from even 50 items (probably around 100), but all of it is useful and I know I can grab anything in there and be happy.

Last Saturday morning I took it a step farther. (I really want to try the capsule wardrobe, but just not sure I can do it. That’s a long way from 14 completely different outfits in a two-week period!)

After a week of paying attention to the things I pull out to wear, I counted out 33 pieces and hung them together at the front. (Along with 5 pair of shoes.) The rest of my items are still in the closet for “just in case”, divided by green hangers, to see what items I may still need along the way. Trial and error with a new system, especially as we transition from highs in the low 50s to highs in the upper 70s, so I don’t want to go too crazy cleaning everything out just yet!

Everything to the left of the green hanger is ok to wear. Jeans, dresses, leggings.

Currently in my closet are:
2 sleeveless turtlenecks (gray, pink)
4 pair of jeans
2 leggings (to go with the dresses)
3 dresses
1 pair gray dress pants
2 camis (black, white)
4 tanks (black, white, pink, teal)
7 sweaters (includes long and 3/4 sleeves)
2 long sleeve tees (gray, lavender)
4 tops
1 lightweight gray hoodie
5 pair of shoes (flats in black, silver, leopard print; heels in black, pink)

Why did I take the picture from this angle? Sorry!

I’m not sure I have enough short sleeve summer tops, and maybe too many sweaters, but I’ll adjust if needed.

I also noticed my go-to colors are black, gray and pink.

Project 333’s guidelines are to inventory your wardrobe at the beginning of each season to see what you may need to include, then shop (just once per season) for those things so you have them.

After cleaning my closet (and having lost weight this past year) I discovered I need to get a pair of black dress pants (everything goes with them!) and I could use a black cardigan for fall and winter. Also on my wish list is a trench coat, either white or stone. They look so great with jeans or for dressing up.

So what do you think? Have you heard of the capsule wardrobe or Project 333? Are you up for the minimizing challenge? Are you at least motivated to go clean out your closet now? Leave a comment and let me know what you think about the capsule wardrobe movement.

Here are links to a few places I’ve found about the capsule wardrobe, how to create one, and even a worksheet on how to get started and find your style.

Project 333
The Anna Edit (England) Blog YouTube
Use Less (Denmark) Blog YouTube
Un-Fancy Blog
Capsule Wardrobe Worksheet (from Un-Fancy) (Awesome resource!) (PDF)
My Green Closet YouTube
Meghan Livingstone YouTube
For interest: One Year, One Dress interview with My Green Closet (a story about a woman who wore the same dress for 365 days!) Frock Around the Clock Blog

My Head vs The Ice (Spoiler: The Ice Won); My Concussion Story

5:30 am: I awoke to a text message saying schools were closed. Since I knew ice could be the problem, I got up to watch the news. Accidents and slide-offs all over.

6:45: I texted my son to be careful on his way from work. (Third shift)

7:30: I left for work after checking the ice situation on the driveway. Definitely a glaze, but didn’t worry too much. I even wore my flat shoes instead of boots. There was hardly any snow, so I never even thought of it.

Traffic moved slow, but people were smart on the ice. Mostly moved at 40-45mph in a typically 55mph zone.

8:15 Stopped at Starbucks. On my way back to the car I thought, “This might have been a good day to use the drive-thru,” as I navigated the glazed parking lot.

North of town the traffic moved a bit faster at 60mph on the highway.

8:45 I arrived at work. The parking lot was covered with snow and a layer of ice. I slightly slid sideways into my parking spot. Ah-hah. Be careful getting out.

I prayed, out loud even, “Lord, I’m afraid of falling. I know fear is not of You, but I have it. I also have faith that You will help me. Please just hold me up so I don’t fall.”

I made a trip into the building, taking small, careful steps with my purse and coffee. Made it in!

“Thank you, Jesus! Now I need to make one more trip to the car to get the rest of my things. Please just hold me up.”

Made it back to the car, grabbed my tote bag, laptop and bowl with my lunch in it.

“OK, Lord, now is when I need You, because when I close this door it might throw my weight and I don’t want to fall. Please just hold me up.”

Holding everything in my left arm, I closed the car door. Still standing.

“Thank you, Jesus. Just hold me up so I can get in the building.”

I took maybe three steps.

BAM!

Before I even knew what was happening I was landing on the back of my head. No time to scream. No time to try to grab for balance. No time to put arms out to stop myself. Just landing on the back of my head.

“Owww…Owww… Owww… Owww… Owww…,” on the ice for about 20 or 30 seconds.

I sat up and said, “God, you didn’t hold me up.”

While still sitting on the ice I texted my pastor, “I fell on the ice. Please check on me.”

I was scared. I know it’s not a good idea to be alone after hitting your head and I had no idea when Pastor planned to be in that day, so I asked hime to check on me in case I passed out or anything.

I managed to get in the building, and long story short, I called 9-1-1 so they could check me. They wrapped my head to hold a bag of ice in place on the goose-egg that had immediately showed up.

Pastor came and took me to ER. I checked out neurologically, so they wrapped my head with more ice and sent me home.

Pastor took me back to work, put me in my car, got my things from inside the church, and sent me home. In retrospect, driving that day was a very bad idea, but I made it.

And that’s where I would be for the next 9 weeks (and counting) - home.

The next week my doctor diagnosed me with a concussion, post-traumatic vertigo and told me not to go back to work for a couple of weeks. (Which has turned into a couple of months now, but I’m almost there!)

I had friends bring meals the first few weeks since it was too hard to stand and cook, and I got tired of take-out.

Most of the first 6 weeks was spent in my chair in front of the tv, resting and doing nothing. There were days I didn’t even get out of my pajamas. Normally I hate being in pajamas all day, but I just didn’t care. (No makeup most days either. Gasp!)

Driving was out of the question. I only started back driving a couple of weeks ago, and then only small trips on quiet roads.

My parents have been more than fabulous about taking me to all of my doctor appointments. I’m so grateful they like road trips because it’s quite a hike for them and time-consuming in their day. But when you have the best parents on the planet, it works in your favor!

(“Thank you, Mom and Dad,” just isn’t enough. I love their sacrificial love for me so much.)

February 8: I woke up at 3:00 am with the worst vertigo! I had some at the beginning, but never this bad. I was sweaty, nauseous and could hardly sit up to roll over. Same at 4:30.

At 6:00 my husband was getting his lunch ready for work. I texted, “Come back up here.”

I could barely sit up. I needed him to help me to the bathroom. He ended up staying home with me that day. Thankfully, I saw my doctor the next day which helped enough for me to be on my own.

By Saturday I was still quite dizzy. I went back to ER for a re-check. They did a CT scan and blood work.

The CT scan came back normal. No bleeding, no bruising.

The blood work showed hypothyroid. Not surprising. Doc diagnosed me with adrenal fatigue the week before.

So I’ve had some work to do and additional diet changes to my already increasingly restricted menu. If you’ve read me for awhile, you know I’ve already had to pare back some things. Now even more! But ultimately I want to be healthy, so I do what Doc says.

Last Friday I saw a neurologist. He said I’m normal!

Verified by two separate medical professionals, people! Normal! Hello!

Yesterday was the 9-week mark. I’m finally starting to feel my normal self again. I have energy. I’m driving on the highways a little more. I’m cooking dinner again. Shopping at the grocery store doesn’t bother me anymore. (Oy, the lights, the people, the noise, all the things to look at. Painful in the beginning.)

I still have to be careful about how I sleep, staying propped up because I don’t want the vertigo to come back. I still feel a twinge of dizziness when I roll over, but that will go away with time.

Somedays I wonder and ask God what the purpose is in all of this. Why did I have to fall when I asked Him to hold me up? Why did I have to sit alone - bored - in my house for the past 2 months? Why did I have to be dependent on so many others to help me? Why is this recovery taking so long?

But here’s how I know He held me up, just not in the way I expected.

The first time I went to ER, there was a 77-year-old woman who broke her arm falling on the ice. Thank you, Jesus, I didn’t break any bones.

The first time I went to ER, as I was leaving there was a woman about my age wheeled in holding a cloth on the back of her head. She fell on the ice too. She asked how many stitches I got. None! Never thought about that. Thank you, Jesus, I didn’t need stitches.

The same day I fell, my neighbor’s friend fell too. He broke the temporal lobe, stayed in the hospital overnight with vertigo and nausea, and had hearing loss for quite awhile. (I’m not sure it’s even back yet.) Thank you, Jesus, I didn’t break bones in my head or have hearing loss.

I didn’t lose consciousness, I never had vision or balance problems, I don’t have memory loss, I haven’t had cognitive issues.

There are so many more things I could have to deal with.

So here’s my bottom line to you. God may not always answer your prayer (“God, hold me up.”) the way you think He will, but He WILL answer your prayer in ways you may not expect.

He showed me how many people love, and are willing to serve me. Some not even being super close friends, but that’s what makes it all the more special.

I learned a long time ago, you find out who your friends are in a crises. I was surprised by a few of my friends who I didn’t know loved me so much!

I know this is a long post. Thank you for sticking it out and reading.

If you’ve had experiences with concussion, vertigo (check out the Foster maneuver), being homebound, dependent, bored, lonely, please leave your comments below and tell me what helped you get through it.

Mistakes Were Made

I’ve made some massive mistakes. Uh, just in the last month!

Mistake One: I quit my job. The one I love, have a passion for, and completely flow in my giftings of organization, typing, creativity and details. I resigned.

My husband and I told our pastors after service one Sunday that I had to resign. I was going to babysit my granddaughter 4 days a week. They were amazingly supportive, understood and prayed with us.

As Pastor Judy prayed, I cried. Not because I was sad to leave, but because already I had a clue I wasn’t doing the right thing.

The next week there were moments of, “Man, I’m glad I won’t have to do this [particular task] anymore.”

There were also moments of, “I don’t want to give this [particular task] up. I don’t want to stop doing this [particular task]. I’m going to miss the people in the community I work with. I don’t want to give my keys back. Who’s going to do this job? I know I’m going to criticize the work that comes out of this office now; I don’t want to do that. Are we going to have to leave this church?”

Endless thoughts and questions!

The next week was also the most trying time of babysitting my granddaughter I’ve ever had. Crying and screaming that would. Not. Quit! One afternoon was an hour and 20 minutes by the time my daughter came to get her. I love the girl, but I was ecstatic to hand her off!

That was the night I sent a text to Pastor Judy and said, “Please don’t say anything publicly yet. Can we talk Sunday? I’m feeling confused.”

How was I ever going to do this four days a week? I’ve always said I’m NOT cut out for daycare. I don’t like it. It’s definitely different with a grandchild - it’s more enjoyable, it’s easier, but it’s not the thing I enjoy most. (I feel like a terrible grandparent when I say that.)

My passion? Office work. (I’ve been in love with forms since I discovered them at 7-years-old!)

My husband and I did a lot of talking. I think we over-discussed it. But we were in agreement that I needed to revoke my resignation. Office work is life-giving for me. It’s my creative outlet. Where was I otherwise going to have that?

The next Sunday we had lunch with Pastors Keith and Judy and they were relieved when I revoked my resignation. I was relieved. I knew it was absolutely the right thing to do.

Mistake Two: When I arrived at my job the week before Christmas, I was trying to set up for the day. Unlocking drawers, setting up my laptop, switching from boots to shoes, checking email on my desktop…ah, the email.

With too many things to distract me, I tried to plow through some emails to catch up and get them cleaned out. There was one from USPS Same Day. It told me a package could not be delivered because nobody was at our office to receive it.

True. I’m only there two days a week.

“Click on the attachment for further instructions.”

You know where I’m going, don’t ya? Yep. I. KNOW. BETTER! But distracted. *Click* and a flash. What was that? Hmm, nothing seems to be happening so I must be ok.

Then my laptop (thank you, Jesus, I had my laptop on!) started showing notifications about Dropbox files being updated.

Long story, short, I downloaded an encryption virus. I had to delete my Dropbox account, but fortunately the virus hadn’t made it to the server yet, so all other documents were safe. Although I’ve lost all my contacts and calendars because our IT guy had to rebuild my desktop.

It’s been 3 weeks since I did that and I’m still fuming mad at myself. I know better than to click on attachments, especially from a Canadian email address that claims to be from the US Post Office. How dumb can you be?

What is my point in sharing these mistakes? Life goes on. We can go back and admit our mistakes, ask forgiveness, change the situation as best we can and move forward.

The world didn’t end because I resigned, then revoked it.

The world didn’t end because I downloaded an encryption virus onto my computer that inconvenienced people for days because they had to work around that.

I know you’ve made some mistakes too. Some are way in the past - over and done with. But some may be recent. The past year, the past month - yesterday.

What can you do to resolve the situation? Sometimes we need to humble ourselves and admit our mistakes - then apologize for the inconvenience we cause everyone! (A la computers with viruses!)

Sometimes the only thing we can do is move forward, having learned from our mistake.

Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead.
Philippians 3:13 [NLT]

Sometimes it’s just therapy to write about it and share your stupidity with the world! Because I know I’m not alone in making mistakes, and I want you to know you’re not either.

Care to share any mistakes you’ve made and how God redeemed them? Let's encourage each other.

Just Say No To Resolutions

When I was in school, my teachers would almost always check the box on my report card that said, "Makes wise use of time." These many years later, it still makes me crazy to waste time.

Over the past couple of weeks I did some goal setting for 2017. I want to look back and see some accomplishments so I know I made wise use of my time. I am intentional about living a life of purpose - to tell a meaningful story with my life.

In January 2016 a few goals I had written were:

• Clean cupboards, closets, clothes, bookshelves, and give things away to Goodwill.

• Have coffee dates with long-lost friends.

• Lose Weight

• Finish an online course I had started, then put aside.

• Publish my health journal book.

I listed specific goals for each area - exactly which cupboards and closets I wanted to clean, which friends I needed to reconnect with, how much weight I was going to lose (and specifically how I was going to do it), when I would finish the course, and set a deadline for publishing my book.

Results? My closets, cupboards, drawers and bookshelves have been pared down by around 60% (and I still look for things to get rid of), I reconnected with 5 long-lost friends, I lost 28.4 pounds and discovered which foods I need to avoid, I finished the course and published my book!

I heard a stat that only 8% of new year resolutions make it to the end of January. That means by the time you read this, if you've made resolutions you're already struggling.

Pastor MarkPettus (Church of the Highlands, Alabama) said, "Resolutions depend on me to fix a problem I caused," and that's not a good idea. He said we need more than willpower, we need a Higher Power - Jesus!

Our resolutions are meaningless if we don't depend on Jesus to change us. I also believe we need to pray and be intentional about the changes we're going to make.

"Behold, I will do something new, now it will spring forth." Isaiah 43:19 [NASB]

For the past couple of years I've read James Clear's Annual Review on his blog. He looks back over his year and discusses the good, the bad, failures, improvements and where he can use those lessons going into the new year. I love his overview-style and it has helped me consider my year and where I'm going.

I also recently read a great article from Chris Guillebeau, "How to Conduct Your Own Annual Review." He's more specific in his review style using a step-by-step process, listing distinct areas, what the summary theme is for each, which 3 or 4 specific action steps it will require, and checking in with yourself each quarter to see how you're doing.

Even though we're already into January, I encourage you to take some time to look over your past year. This may not be a quick process; it may even take a few days, but that's ok so you can put a good plan together. What are your wins? What are your losses? What did you learn from them? Where do you want to go in 2017? What will it take to get there?

Even if you don't meet all your goals (I didn't in 2016), at least you've got something to aim for. You'll have a story of accomplishment to tell on December 31, 2017. You'll be excited and proud of living a story of purpose.

"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." Mary Kay Ash

A few of my goals for 2017 are to be consistent in daily time with God, walk at least 5000 steps per day, connect with 4 or 5 long-lost friends (the ones I didn't make it to last year), read 6-10 books, attend the Tribe Writers Conference in September.

Check out James Clear and Chris Guillebeau and let me know if you create a plan for 2017. Just say no to resolutions and yes to goals!

Happy New Year, Sweet Friends! Thank you for being on this journey with me.

And let's check in with each other on January 1 so we can see how well we did!

Weekend Reads

Photo: Drew Coffman

It's been super busy at my house this week. My daughter and her husband were finally able to move into their new home, prayer meeting Monday night, election returns Tuesday night, leaders meeting Wednesday night, and here it is, Thursday afternoon, and I'm finally able to sit down to write.

Hurry up, inspiration, where are you?

**crickets**

Ever have weeks like that?

In my rush to write with limited time, I have no deep words or encouragement or inspiration for you. Ideas, but not time to develop them.

But I have friends who did, so I'm going to share some of their work this week.

I hope that's ok with you.

Finding Sanctuary: Christmas, Philip Stephen Allen

I've sharedPhilip's music with you before, and I still have codes left if you haven't gotten your free download from him. Let me know.

Philip just released his new Christmas album this week, Finding Sanctuary: Christmas. Oh. My. Goodness! LOVE! Naturally, it's beautiful, soothing piano music. Get your download here for only $8, or wait a couple of weeks for the CD for only $12. Both come with other bonuses.

Lost In Translation, Jeff Blackburn

"You might find yourself in a parking lot…risking conversation with strangers because you are desperate for help. And you might cry…not because they have the all the answers…but because they saw you. They heard you. They touched you. And they cared."

What Can You Change Today, Nancy Bouwens

"In a culture which feeds selfishness it will take a collection of intentional choices each day to create a way of living where you are not sucked into the vacuum of an out of balance life."

Buying Dirt, Joshua Mikeworth

"The Kingdom of Heaven is like a treasure that a man discovered hidden in a field. In his excitement, he hid it again and sold everything he owned to get enough money to buy the field." [Matthew 13:44] I'm buying dirt. With everything I've got. Because that's where the lasting treasure is.

Are We A Moving Target, Doris Swift

"Our mission may not look like Esther’s, but it’s every bit as important. Keep seeking the face of God, keep persevering in the face of persecution, and keep serving to glorify Him."

Be Real Health Journal

NOW AVAILABLE!

ORDER YOUR BE REAL HEALTH JOURNAL TODAY

Learn how to slow down and notice the world around you, make memories with loved ones, drink more water, enjoy your food, get adequate rest and more. Then follow the 28-day health journal checklist to evaluate each area to get an idea of your overall health and where you may need to make adjustments.

I love checklists, they help me stay accountable to myself as well as help me remember what I need to do. That's why I've created the Be Real Health Journal, for other checklist-lovers like me!

The checklist provides reminders for getting enough water, sleep, nutrition, supplements, etc, as well as help you keep track of the food you eat and how it makes you feel, so you'll notice if a pattern emerges - either good or bad!

Here's to changing your health. You can do this!

There is no failure, just a learning process on the journey!

Order your copy of the Be Real Health Journal here.

Topics Include:

• Intentions
• Relationships
• Slow Down
• Food
• Activity
• Journal Pages (includes link to additional pages)

Get Your Copy: Be Real Health Journal: A Guide To Slowing Down For Better Health ($16)

Do You Need A Reason

…not to eat a gallon of ice cream?

…not to eat a whole bag of potato chips?

…not to eat a dozen chocolate chip cookies?

…not to eat a whole pizza?

…not to eat the whole pan of brownies?

…not to sabotage your efforts toward health?

Here are 9 reasons!

Because You Are…

Beautiful

OK, so you're no Audrey Hepburn. Neither am I. But I believe all women are beautiful in their own way. Whether you're skinny, pudgy, have long hair or short, wear glasses or not, dress in styles from Michael Kors or Wal-Mart, every woman has beauty. And the beauty of that is - God made us all different so we can reflect His glory in different - beautiful - ways!

Smart

I'm not college-educated; a fact I have lamented the past 30+ years. But I'm smart. I raised two amazing (crazy!) children. I know how to keep a household budget. I know about health and nutrition. I don't need fancy degrees or education to be smart. Neither do you! What are you good at?

Strong

You have endured deep pain, many trials and heartache. Things haven't always gone the way you think they should. Maybe you have even questioned God about why He let things happen. But in the end, you have overcome. You survived what you thought was un-survivable. You are victorious and know God to be faithful.

Special

There's no one like you. Anywhere. Ever. You can do things nobody else can do.

A Treasure

You make people smile. They are blessed when you use your gifts to serve others. They look forward to you being in the room with them because they always feel better when you part ways.

Worthy

You have value. You are important. Not because of anything you do or say, but just because you are.

Lovable

God loves you. God even LIKES you. The people in your life love you. Your words are always comforting and encouraging.

Needed

We need you! You are a friend to many. You make us laugh. You challenge us to be better people. You keep us accountable. You have things to teach us.

Wanted

I want you. I like that you exist because you bless my life. I would miss you if you were gone and there would be a hole if you weren't here.

Maybe you read this list over and say, "Yeah, right. I'm not any of those things. Pass the Bubba size fries and a pan of brownies because I'm just not worth it."

Long-term mindsets are hard to let go of. They're hard to change. It takes time and it takes work. But I want to challenge you to begin today to make just a tiny little change. Because I believe with all my heart you are all of those things above, and more.

Weight loss and health can be a struggle to accomplish. Don't be discouraged and give up before you even try. Enlist the help of friends in your life to keep you accountable, someone who can challenge you, someone who will tell you - you're beautiful, smart, strong, special, a treasure, worthy, lovable, needed and wanted - until you actually start to believe it for yourself!

Is there anything I can do to help? Comment below, or feel free to email me. Because I just gave you 9 reasons to change! YOU ARE LOVED!

How To Answer Your Bathroom Scale

My brother is three years younger than I am. When we were kids we fought like brothers and sisters do. I remember more than one occasion when we would say to each other, "You're not the boss of me."

As the older sister, of course I thought I was the boss of him! Where my older sisters at? Am I right?

As a health coach I know better than to be a slave to my scale, yet I weigh myself (and my self-worth) every morning. When I'm down 2/10 of a pound I rejoice. If I'm up 2/10 of a pound I beat myself up, analyze everything I had put in my mouth the day before and leave the bathroom feeling defeated, or at least frustrated.

I also know what the scale says doesn't mean a whole lot. It taunts. It lies. It is NOT my BFF.

I'm 51-years-old. Not yet older than dirt, but not so young anymore. My body is starting to do funky things. I have to try harder just to maintain, not to mention any improving I'd like to do. Muscle, hormones, fat - it's all a battle now.

The foods I choose to eat make a big difference in how my body handles things. So I'm very conscious of what I eat, making sure to get enough vegetables, drink enough water and get some decent exercise. Even when I do it "wrong", I'm still at least conscious of what I'm doing. Very conscious of that latte with 43 grams of sugar! Oy.

So when I step on the scale, I will not allow it to control me. It will not taunt me. It will not mock me. It will not lie to me. It will not determine my self-worth. It will not define my health. Because I know the healthy choices I'm making, and the scale cannot measure health - or self-worth; it's only one small tool in a large toolbox to measure where I am in the journey.

Making smart choices (healthy food, exercise) and journaling my habits (slowing down, making memories, getting rest) is helping me see the overall picture of my health. And I'm really doing pretty good!

A three-digit number alone is not at all a measure of health.

So when you step on the scale and it starts to lie to you, just tell it, "I don't care what you say. You're not the boss of me!"

Stress Relief In Your Why

A 2015 survey by the American Psychological Association reveals some of the top stressors for Americans. Money is the top stressor at 67%, followed by work at 65%.

Coming in fourth is personal health concerns at 51%.

Really? Only 51%? Considering the health crisis we have, I'm surprised that number isn't much higher.*

What Stress Does to the Body

A few of the many affects stress can have on the body are 

• Headaches

• Sleeplessness

• Depression

• High Blood Pressure

• Stomach Aches

• Weakened Immune System

• Back Aches

Psalm 62:7b-8 (NASB)

The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God. Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah.

It's not known exactly how the word Selah is meant to be used, but some suggestions are:

• rest, reflect, peace, pause and think, consider carefully

Stress comes from how we spend our time. 

We can't do everything we are currently doing. It's impossible.

I'm currently feeling stress to levels I haven't experienced in a long time. Some of the stress is because of the joy I have of being with my 14-month-old granddaughter four mornings a week. It’s fun, but it's work!

I also work 16 hours a week for my pastor, lead a health group at my church and want to write again. Mostly my time is spent working, babysitting and sleeping.

I'm exhausted. I know I can't do everything I'm currently doing, but I do have an end-date in sight. So I keep going, knowing the next few weeks are going to be the hardest, making sure to find time to breathe deep and sit outside for a few minutes to recharge when I can.

What about you? Are you keeping a schedule you find impossible? Are you spending time on things you wish you weren't; on things that don't matter to you?

Do you know your why in life? Your purpose?

When you know your why, that is what you should focus on. Then every decision you make with your time can be filtered through that. Maybe a movie with the coffee club would be fun, but how does it affect the time you spend on what's most important to you?

When you know your why, it will be easy to decide what to say yes to and when you need to decline invitations to events.

Right now, my why is supporting my pastor and helping my children as they work on making a new home for themselves. My why for writing is to encourage you to live a healthy life and have health to accomplish your why.

Live intentionally for your purpose.

If you need help or accountability, ask for it! Your friends and family don't know if you don't say something. Forget pride and be real - connect with someone who can help you. Open your heart to talk to someone so you can get free from the things that are holding you slave to time.

You need balance in your life. You need time to follow your passion and purpose, but you also need time to have fun with family; maybe that movie date is exactly what you need to take your mind away from stressors.

Be sure to rest and recharge, whatever that looks like for you. A day away on the lakeshore, a coffee date with your BFF, a Sunday afternoon nap - find your reset button and push it!

Jeremiah 6:16 (NASB)

Thus says the Lord, "Stand by the ways and see and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is, and walk in it; and you will find rest for your souls."

The best rest is to take time with Jesus. Search His peace, follow where He wants you to go, listen for His voice in the stress and chaos.

II Corinthians 4:16-18 (NIV)

So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. 

In your stress, remember to keep perspective. Follow your why, your purpose, your passion - but remember, in the end, it's all about eternity. You'll always have stress in life, it will never go away. But keep your focus on Jesus for peace in your stress.

Do what you must, eliminate what you can. Simplify and find time to rest. 

Hint: I actually have "Nothing" scheduled on my calendar so I don't make appointments or commitments. Schedule "Nothing" sometime during the week, whether it's for an hour, or a whole day. Do nothing! (Which means, whatever you feel like. Even if it's just watching TV, you can tell people you have an appointment!)

"When you understand your why, your what has more impact." ~Michael Jr.

This man's singing is a beautiful example of pursuing your why!

Did you know my new book, Be Real Health Journal, is now available for purchase? Check it out here!

*2015 Stress in America: American Psychological Association

You Being You Is Enough

I have a friend who is going through a really tough time right now. It seems as though the world is crashing in around her. I know the feeling - I've been there done that - but there is nothing I can do to help the situation. I do what I can to help her and let her know how much she is loved.

In an effort to show her how much we love her, a couple of us took her out to lunch. I chose a local place they hadn't been to yet.

When we were seated our server greeted us. In typical Ed-fashion, he asked the server what words of wisdom he had for us. This catches most people off-guard, but this guy was on top of his game! "I don't have any words of wisdom, but we have great coffee! Can I bring you some?"

It's rare that Ed is speechless, so my friend and I were already laughing as he sat with his mouth open and no response!

We had a fabulous time at Anna's House (please go there if you live locally!) and Tim was one of the best servers I've ever had! We laughed - a lot!

We were amazed at how God placed us in that restaurant, on that day, at that time, with that server, who was perfect for what we needed - lots of laughter!

A few days later as I was thinking about Tim and the timing of that day, I was still amazed at how God arranged it all.

I thought to myself how Tim, being Tim, was all we needed. He didn't have to perform or do something perfect. He didn't have to do something he wasn't good at to be great. He didn't have to put on a front to be a blessing. Tim, being Tim, bantering and joking, was exactly perfect for us in that moment.

I'm asking you to remember that for yourself: You being you is enough.

It's perfect. It's exactly what someone needs at the location and time you meet them. Use what you're good at to bless others and that will be enough. Don't perform, don't strive, don't even be perfect - just be you, and that will be enough.

Free Music for You!

Photo: The Clearing, Philip Stephen Allen

“These are great popsicles! What flavor did you get?”

“I’m not sure. It’s orange, but doesn’t taste like orange. The flavor is familiar but I can’t put my finger on it.”

“Cantaloupe?”

“Yeah, that’s it!”

Thus began my relationship with Philip Stephen Allen, during a popsicle break at the Tribe Writers Conference in Nashville last August.

My favorite questions to ask all weekend were, “Where are you from?” and “What do you write?”

I asked Philip where he was from and what he wrote, and from there we twisted into a discussion of music. (I later thanked my son for teaching me about movie and video game soundtracks because I was able to carry on an intelligent conversation! I was even able to suggest music Philip hadn’t heard of. Winning!)

Philip told me a story of his step-daughter, Chloe; it’s one I will never forget. Because he is a musician and has a sound studio in his home, he was able to adjust the voice of this special needs young lady and made her sound amazingly beautiful! (Read her story and listen to her song here: Fixing Chloe)

When I got back to my hotel room that night, I checked out Philip’s music and loved it. When I complimented him the next day, he was kind enough to send a link so I could download it!

Philip’s instrumental, ambient compositions are calming, peaceful and are great to listen to on the way home from work when I’m stuck in traffic, it’s nice background music at dinner time, it’s perfect for listening to through earbuds at bedtime, really, it’s great to listen to any time!

Philip and I have stayed in touch since the Tribe Writers Conference. Because my husband and I love his music so much I asked him if he would be willing to share it with you, my fabulous friends, and he has agreed. 

You guys, I am SO excited about this!

You can check out the recently remastered album here: The Clearing

To download your free copy, send me an email and let me know you want it and I will send a unique code with the link to redeem it.

In his email to me Philip said, “I hope your whole list grabs a copy.”

Yes! Me too! Do not miss this!

And if you love it as much as I do, or even if you just find it mildly enjoyable, please contact Philip to thank him and connect with him. I know he'd love to hear from you.

Connect with Philip:

Facebook: Philip Stephen Allen

Blog: Philip Stephen Allen

Twitter: PSACreates

SoundCloud: Philip Stephen Allen (to hear his works in progress)

Why This Isn’t Goodbye

Photo: Viktor Hanacek

Last week I had the opportunity to attend Storyline Conference in the Chicagoland area. I went last year and it was life changing; it was again this year.

We heard from so many amazing people who are living incredible stories. Please check out I’ll Push You (inspiring 5-minute video) and Jeremy Cowart (oh man, watch his TED Talk at the bottom the page!) and Bob Goff (and more) - you’ll be inspired too!

One of the breakout sessions I attended was with Joshua Becker. You’ve heard me mention him before. I had the privilege of having lunch with him in Nashville in August, I’ve talked about his blog becoming minimalist, and he has just launched The Hope Effect. (Don’t forget I need your help with that! I’m trying to raise $1200 for orphans.)

While Joshua didn’t really say anything I haven’t already heard him say, or have read on his blog, his story struck me in a deeper way this time. 

Living minimalist isn’t just cleaning the clutter out of our houses, but also out of our lives. I’m cleaning apps off my phone, unnecessary events from my calendar, relationships that don’t build me up or encourage me.

(I’m also cleaning out closets and drawers!)

The conference, paired with discussion with my traveling buddy, Nancy Bouwens from An Intentional Life, makes me believe God is leading me in a new direction.

While driving to church last week I thought about how the trees let go of their leaves in the fall, but it’s only for a season. The leaves will come back better and more beautiful in the spring. But if the trees don’t let go of the leaves, there’s no room for something new - there’s no growth.

For a season I need to let go of some “leaves”. They’re pretty leaves and I love my leaves, but just for a season I need to let them go. In the spring they can bud and be beautiful again. The only thing is, I don’t know what they will look like.

What I’m saying is, I’m going to take some time away from blogging.

One year ago after the Storyline Conference, I set out to write once per week, every week for this blog. I’ve accomplished that goal. I’ve told a story in 2015 that I wanted to tell, and I’m proud of myself for doing it!

Now, after Storyline 2016, I don’t know where God is taking me. I don’t know what story He wants me to tell this year. But I do know that my calendar is too full. My self-imposed schedule is too much for me to maintain. I’m making myself nuts with things I wonder if are really the most important things in my life to focus on right now.

So, for a season, I’m taking time off. I’m going to read the stack of books that I haven’t had time for. I’m going to coffee and lunch with people who love me the most and mean the most to me. I’m going to spend extra time with my princess granddaughter.

I’m going to be less of a slave to social media and spend more time connecting in real life and making memories for myself and my family and friends.

I’m going to take time to really listen to what God has for me and which direction He’s taking me.

I’m just going to slow down and rest.

I love writing and I will be doing lots of that as well. Maybe some of it will end up on this blog or in your email on occasion. Maybe I’ll be back with an entirely different blog in the new season. I don’t know.

So, this isn't goodbye, just a see you in the figurative spring.

Thank you for being faithful friends in this little community. You can still always reach me via Twitter and Facebook - I would LOVE to hear from you. ANYTIME!

Now go live your life and tell a great story!